I was happy to awake this morning and see that the calendar had turned to January 7th. Yesterday marked the 6th anniversary of Shannon's passing. 6 years is too long without her, and we know that feeling will only grow.
Of all the anniversaries, I think Jan. 6 might be the worst. There is such finality to it. Although it's the day Shannon's suffering ended, I don't feel any peace at all about January 6th.
Yesterday, we each found our ways of coping with our emotions. Erin spent the night of the 5th at a slumber party with some of her besties. That way, she could wake up surrounded by people who love and care for her.
I chose to drag my butt to the athletic club and play tennis with my girlfriends. People who knew what day it was, and were there to lift me up. Girlfriends still make my world a better place, even 6 years down the road.
Before I returned from tennis, Erin returned home from her sleepover and she and Dan spent some time reading passages from Determined to Matter. Remembering what it was like in the days after Shannon passed. How Erin had to go back to school, go back to basketball practice and start living the rest of her life. How did she do that at 10 years old not completely fall apart?
Dan, Erin and I had wonderful messages and texts from family and friends who remember. People who get it. I had one friend remind me what a gift Shannon was. What a nice way to think about her life.
January 6th just brings the pain of knowing the rest of our lives are not what we envisioned. It doesn't mean we don't feel happiness and enjoy our days. We do. But it's different than we'd like it to be. We just have to take it day by day and do the best we can. That's true for all of us, though, isn't it?
January is a busy month for the foundation as we are receiving scholarship applications and gearing up for the Shannon Cup youth tournaments as well. This is the good we can do in Shannon's memory. Her cells are still being used for research at Mayo Clinic. That's the good Shannon chose to do. This is what she wanted. To make a difference.
And so, 2018 has begun. The calendar has turned. Living the rest of our lives... that's what we're doing...
