Yesterday's weather here was ominous and befitting our mood - low, grey clouds and cold whipping winds made you want to curl up in the fetal position. Dan and I, feeling emotionally tapped out, were having trouble managing our anger and sadness yesterday. By last night, we had to just ask our families to give us some space and let the four of us be alone in our own home. Family, of course, obliged. They would do anything, I mean anything we asked. And that's part of the problem. There is nothing to be done. Watch and wait and hope for resolution. Sometimes having more people help you do that isn't a comfort. But, sometimes it is. Sometimes you just need to be alone with your thoughts. And sometimes you need support. It is a roller coaster ride that is keeping everyone around us on their toes.
While these days are lingering now, I'm trying to have faith that in the future, this will be just one tiny piece of our journey. It is all consuming at the moment, but it will pass. We need to stay strong and believe that we can get through this stage, just like we have so many others.
Today brings us to the end of winter break. Tomorrow normal daily life should begin again. Dan has some work to do. Erin has to go to school. It's time to carry on as best we can, all while still keeping Shannon as safe and warm and as comfortable as she can be. I'm not sure how Dan or Erin will concentrate on the tasks at hand, but they have to try.
I'm hoping for a better day today. I'm pretending I don't hear that cold wind outside the window ...
