Sunday May 5, 2013

Dan and I are up enjoying coffee and sunshine.  Erin is taking advantage of the chance to sleep in.  She has been keeping quite the social calendar - she had a friend over Wednesday, a different friend over Thursday, out to a movie and sleepover with yet another friend on Friday.  To keep her streak alive, the three of us headed out to dinner at a friend's house on Saturday.  Erin is enjoyable and entertaining in all these settings, and we feel as though we continue to settle into our life as a family of three.  It's not too hard considering Erin is pretty comfortable hanging out with people ranging in age from 12 to 65...

Dan and I are very conscious of Erin and her needs.  With the publication of the book, this month is going to involve public appearances and lots of "Shannon stuff", for lack of a better term.  While the book and the foundation is really about all of us moving forward, to Erin it's a little bit stifling to have Shannon so present in our everyday lives right now.  Erin deserves the chance to live and laugh and be who she was meant to be.  We are doing our best to let her know that's all we expect.

Yesterday's radio interview went well.  While I'm not a medical expert, I am an "expert" on our journey and Shannon's battle.  I can converse easily about these things, and I do believe those dates and memories will be with me forever.

I was thinking yesterday that I don't cry as much about Shannon any more.  I don't know if that's a good thing, but it just is.  Maybe it's that I feel something positive right now with the book launch.  Maybe it's that we're further away from Shannon's death.  Maybe it's progress.  

I still feel a deep, painful heartache when something reminds me of her - a song on the radio, a game on TV, a story about her popping to mind.  Dan and I watched her tribute video this morning, and I can feel it in my gut when I hear her voice.  

But, we are grateful to have those things - pictures, videos, stories, memories.  I guess that's how we keep Shannon with us as we move further and further down the road...