Friday March 16, 2012

"How are you doing?" If I had a nickel for every time someone asked me that ...

I don't mean to sound ungrateful. Some people just say it in passing, but a lot of people genuinely want to know. My problem with the question is, I don't have a good answer. It's an innocuous, common greeting that leaves me perplexed. I guess my answer is too complicated ...

Most of the time, I could say "We're mostly doing pretty well, but ..." There's always a but. We get up every day and try to forge ahead, doing what needs doing. But, I think of Shannon every day. And that means if you catch me at the right moment, then my honest answer would have to be "I'm struggling right now because my heart just aches, but ... I can get through this moment of sadness and carry on." That's way too much info to share in passing with someone. So I usually just say "We're doing ok, thanks." It's just easier ...

This week we received cards and e-mails from people who wanted us to know that they are still thinking about us - and about Shannon. The most touching one was a hand written note on half a piece of notebook paper from an 8th grade boy. He just wanted to let us know that something happened this week at school and it reminded him of Shannon and that made him happy to remember her that way. Wow. So kind and thoughtful of him to do that.

There's a certain duty we are feeling to carry on in Shannon's spirit - be a good example and hold our heads high, acknowledging those around us. Some days that's a tall task, but when we do that, we are reminded of the good in the world. It's out there if our minds and our hearts are open. Wasting our time living any other way seems foolish...